We’re all feeling it lately. The heavy, suffocating dread perched squarely on our chests every night as we’re lying in bed. The shame and burden of our collective failures as a society like a cat with its bony-ass elbow digging into our sternum, preventing us from sleep. We blew it, you guys. We blew it bad. And it’s hard to think about anything else. So, in that spirit, Taylor and I decided not to reward you with sugar-coated Valentine’s treats today, but rather some bleak forecasting of our impending doom as a civilization. Yay! Welcome to the future! But not a cool tech future with hoverboards and flying cars and shit. No, this is more like a cross between 1984 and Idiocracy. Orwellian in its authoritarianism and propensity for doublespeak, and Idiocracian because BETSY DEVOS.