The Mall of America is a Cross Between a Dystopian Satire and the Best Stoned You’ve Ever Been

Happy Almost Thanksgiving, turkeys! And look at us actually posting two weeks in a row! See, there are still things to be thankful for these days. You’re welcome. In the spirit of my recent move to Minnesota and our impending Black Friday (but actually Thursday) consumerist gluttony, I thought now would be an apropos time to tell you all about my new favorite place on earth…

THE MALL OF AMERICA.

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Packing for Paris

I always overpack. ALWAYS. Three day trip to Nashville? Six dresses. Week-long trip to Chicago? Eight pairs of jeans. Weekend at the beach? Three pairs of boots. It’s a problem. And for someone who loves planning so much, you would think that I would do a better job of it when it comes to packing. I think what it is for me, though, is that my propensity for planning is far outweighed by my crippling fear of not having enough options, so I throw everything I can possibly fit into the suitcase… juuuuuust in case. This is stupid for many reasons, the main one being that once I get back home I have to then unpack all this shit that I didn’t even/was never going to wear, and unpacking is the piiiiiiiitts.

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Shopper Discretion Advised

Shopping smart is a skill. And it’s one that Taylor and I have only just recently begun to perfect. In college we would go to the mall and buy mountains of Forever 21 clothes that ended up never getting worn and ultimately being re-sold to Plato’s Closet and Rag-O-Rama so we’d have money to buy cigs and Chipotle.

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A Review of Madison Reed (Not Ashley Madison)

Once upon a time, Taylor did not care so much about her hair. She used to let me cut it in our disgusting college apartment bathroom after multiple gin and tonics, with the same scissors I used to open packages of batteries for my Discman and cut the tags off my new Forever 21 gear. The atrocities I carried out on her head as a result of this were many, so much so that I even apologized to her for it during my maid of honor speech at her wedding many years later.

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90s Trends, Rated

Happy Wednesday, dudes! We still can’t get it tf together, but a late post is an improvement over no post at all, right?

So let’s talk about how the 90s are fully back. Lindsey and I are at that age where we get to experience the return of trends we were alive to see the first time, and I don’t know about her, but I’m having flashbacks of my mom telling me that one day I’d know what it was like to see younguns rocking the same styles that I cringe remembering myself in as an adolescent. What my mom didn’t predict is that I’d be HERE FOR IT.Β  Read More